Once upon a time, a little fairy was born. She had a great time being whirled into existence Ina. Mist of sparkle and bell-rings. The little fairy is a happy little fairy.
After a while, a social worker fairy came to visit her.
“So, little fairy, have you decided what you’d like to do?”
“I love to have fun and fly around the world.”
“Sure, I love doing that to. But what kind of fairy would you like to be?”
“What kind of fairy?”
“What kind of fairy, like tooth fairy, or earth fairy, or fire fairy?”
“Oh, those are cool! What else is available? What are you?”
” Well, I am a social worker fairy. I help fairies who can’t find a job to find out what they want to be.”
“So… What else can I be?”
The social worker whips out a foot-thick book out of her fairy backpack, which is to say no one really knew where it came from.
“I’m glad you asked. Here is volume one of two hundred and fifty six. Take a quick look.”
And so, the little fairy sat down. And reviewed the first book of fairy tales to see what kind of job she wanted in life.
“I don’t like any of it.”
“Okay,” said the social worker fairy,”no worries, let’s take a quick look at volume two” and just as magically as she produced volume one, she put away volume one and produced volume two, some where from behind her back.
“No, I don’t like any of these either.”
And so on and so forth until they have reviewed all two hundred and fifty six volumes of fairy tales.
“I don’t like any of them.”
“Well, dear…” Social worker is now a bit exhuasted and exasperated. “You have to be some thing. A fairy can’t just go around being nothing!”
“Can’t I just be a fairy?”
“Well…”the social worker did not expect to have to have this talk with the young fairy. “So, it’s time you knew the truth. The fairies have a rule, that each fairy must have a job. If a fairy cannot hold it’s job, the fairy will lose it’s fairy wings… And then it will be a fairy no more.”
The little fairy is mystified and scared at the same time. She has never felt such emotion in her short life.
“So… I must work at a fairy job in order to be a fairy? But what if I don’t want to work?”
“Your wings well fall off and your magic glitter glands will cease producing magic. You will drop to the ground. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, some times it turns into a rock, or a puddle of goo. Some times, the fairy turns into a mealworm or sloth or snail… It is quite unpleasant I can assure you.”
“Yes dear, can we take one more glimpse at this book to see if anything might interest you?”
“Can I be a fairy queen?”
“That’s already taken, my dear.”
“Can I be a tooth fairy?”
“That’s really popular, and all roles have been filled ”
“Can I be a wind fairy?”
“Yes, but you have to be air fairy for a century before you can be a wind fairy.”
“Can I be a naughty fairy?”
“Which one?… Wait, I think naughty fairy roles are all full. And plus I don’t think a pretty one like yourself will be a good fit for any role as a naughty fairy.”
“Not a good fit?”
“Oh, sorry, it’s human HR terminology.. You can be anything you want to be dear! But let’s move on shall we?”
“Can I be a secret agent fairy?”
“Errrr…no. secret agent fairies are a special breed, and you are not one.”
The little fairy is starting to feel sad…
“Oh dear, come, this is supposed to be the funnest time of your life! Choosing your job that will lead you to a fun and full filling life, doing all kinds of magic and flying and fun!”
“Can I be match-making fairy?”
“You don’t have the magical organs for that”
“Can I be a train fairy?”
“Oh dear, I think trains are a bad bet… High-speed in America may not make it, and plus they kind of stink.”
“Can I be an internet fairy?”
“Full, and plus nobody trusts internet fairies, there’s too much fake news on it.”
“Can I be a fairy fairy?”
“You mean… Oh, hahaha, you mean a social worker like myself?”
“No. Hahaha, I am the social worker. If you do my job, what could I do? No, no, you certainly don’t want to turn me into a puddle of goo, do you?” The social worker chuckled quite nervously… “No, no, no, you want some thing else, I’m sure of it.”
“Can I be a dream fairy?”
“Hrmn… No, that’s full. And plus you have to have five centuries of experience as a sleep fairy.”
“Can I be a sleep fairy?”
“No…” The social worker caught her self
“Wait.. yes, sleep is not a very popular activity right now, I think I can pull some fairy strings and place you as a sleep fairy!”
“Place me? What does that mean?”
“Ohh, sorry, I don’t actually work for the fairy queen or fairidom itself. I am an independent recruiting contractor. We lobbied the fairyland laws to classify us as social workers, and we have a union.”
“Can I be an independent contractor fairy?”
“Oh dear … You have to have a lot of experience to do that. Let’s stick with sleeping”
The social worker is visibly tired… She slumped into a heavy slouch… “Phewww” the little fairy heard her sound from a fairy hole.
“Now then, sleep fairy puts people to sleep, and so they are a precursor for dreams.”
“Okay.”the little fairy is now bored out of her mind.
“I can see you are bored of sleeping like many young people. But sleep is good for you.”
“Okay, I’ll be a sleep fairy…”
“Good, so it’s settled. You will be hearing from my aide who has all the paper work. When can you start?”
“Before my wings fall off and my body turns to goo I suppose.”
“Great! Welcome aboard.”